Urban Dictionary defines “sapiosexual” as ” (adj) A form of sexual orientation characterized by a strong attraction to intelligence in others, often regardless of gender and/or conventional attractiveness.” Well, Urban Dictionary notwithstanding, a sapiosexual is someone who finds intelligence the most sexually attractive feature of another. Since the brain is the largest sexual organ of both sexes yeah, I hear some of you snickering how size doesn’t matter a sapiosexual person isn’t as taken by visual stimuli as they are with intellect and wit. This isn’t to say that sapiosexuals aren’t attracted to attractive people, but the attractive person MUST have a keen mind. Still confused? Here are 6 sure signs you’re a sapiosexual.
1. When playing Scrabble or Words with Friends, you know Sapiosexual isn’t a valid word but you’re impressed that they tried to use it any way. Words can be so damned sexy!
Here are some of my favorite words: hedonistic, cacophony, tempestuous, fervent, cognoscente, voluminous, indelible, enigmatic, serendipity, retronym, flourish, luminous, assiduous, poignant, impassioned, and contentious. Funny, some of these words could describe my ideal man!
2. You can spot a pseudo-sapiosexual which means if you can spot a fake one, you’re a real one, by how they text, write letters or tweet. They may want to impress with their vocabulary, but if they misspell, dangle participles unless its a measure of enticement or use words out of context, their intellectual virility may parallel their performance. Well okay, with phone usage, you must build in a buffer for auto-correct mistakes. For example, the following two sentences use uncommon words. One is correct, the other isn’t. Can you spot the sapiosexual sentence?
His braggadocio was acerbic in a pleasurable way. His biting wit was at once tempting and revolting. Her rationale knew better than to get involved with such a boorish character, but her hubris caused her to lucubrate during nights they weren’t together as to how to channel his discourse into intercourse.
Though he ruminated as to why he consistently chose women who were nymphatic, disingenuine and inane, he was happy he had a woman who could turn heads with her physique.
3. Sapiosexuals actually LISTEN to lyrics of songs and will happily choose Leonard Cohen over Lil Wayne. The brain must be stimulated and teased with feathery words, not shanked by “in your face” sexual terminology.
4. A Sapiosexual understands that the best foreplay is a philosophical discussion. Or a debate without anger but filled with respect for the other’s thoughts. Or a union of words, emotions and thoughts made flesh. Mind and flesh orgasms are the best!
5. A Sapiosexual will analyze before they finalize. They are informed not just opinionated. They know what constitutes an impractical Utopian.
6. A Sapiosexual is more impressed by the flexing of the intellect than the flexing of the biceps.
So….do any of these describe you?