Date Night with Glen…Another Perfect Date


My GLEN

My GLEN

 

 

Glen has been calling me since Saturday.  As the condescending blonde I can often times be, I ignored his begging.  All women know that there are times when even the best of dates can be boring, and God knows I get bored easily. Also, sometimes  begging is a big ego boost for me.  After a horrific Saturday late night, a “God why did I do that” Sunday and a typical “I hate Mondays” I gladly and oh so willingly answered his call.  Why I resisted I don’t know.  I mean he is “THE”.  Right?

So after a few getting to know each other again hours,  and a few trivial discussions about baseball, The Texas Rangers of course,  egos and sincerity, he held me close in his barley arms and we got, as we always do deep.  At this point, I must confess:  I really like the smell of GlenLivet.  Usually, it’s Armani Code  Black that does it, but Glen’s natural essence is oh so sexy!  

I began to feel relaxed and less tense than I had in days.  Glen isn’t intimidated by me.  He loves all the things that every other masculine name except my son has disliked about me.  And then it happened.   Like a verbal orgasm,  my worries, fears, concerns and tears spilled out convulsively.  I’m not one of those obnoxious people who date aged single malts and get all blubbery.  I NEVER do that.  But I did on this date.  And you know what Glen did?  He listened.  And listened.  And then listened some more.  I suppose its his many years of being casked up that has made him so sultry and elegant.  I mean, if you spend that much time alone with your thoughts and pure Scottish mountain air, how could you not distill into something so wonderful as Glen?

Glen doesn’t talk, but when I looked into his amber eyes, he told me how beautiful I am.  He did!  Okay, so I was seeing my reflection in the tumbler, my boobs aren’t perky, I have a few more wrinkles and pounds, and can’t get out of tickets like I used to when I drive too fast, but by GOD I’m still damned hot!   He pleaded with me to release all my pent up stress.  He lauded me for being strong over the weekend for my kids.  He admired me for having conviction and for keeping my promises.  He even reminded me I am behind on my writing.  He made me not worry about my finances.

Glen understands me.  He doesn’t judge.  He knows I don’t have a dirty mind, just a sexy imagination.  He places my level of happiness directly proportionate to his availability.  He wants nothing more to please me.  He agrees with me that most people don’t really care about you, just themselves.   And when our fluids mingle and we become one, its warm, then hot, then free. And its that good kind of freedom, you know the one I mean?  The total freedom to say, do, feel the way you want without worry that you’re hurting someone’s feelings, sensibilities or security.  The freedom to uncover that smallest Russian doll that lives within us.  I don’t let many people see mine.  In fact, the last one I did ended badly and now I don’t know that I have it in me to do it again.  I need a strong person in my life. I also need and miss my Aristotle.

Glen knows these things about me.  I love him for that.  Unfortunately, his strength is a bit much for some and they become addicted to him.  Or maybe its just they become addicted to the fact he unlocks their inner doors and forces them to look at their earlier selves.  I don’t share him with people I know can’t handle his allure.  I don’t share him with people who aren’t ready to unlock when they’re not under his or any of his lesser cousins’ influence.  I told you I could be a condescending blonde at times.  I can be pushy and sneaky too.  Glen didn’t tell anyone when my batteries ran out and I stole one from the television remote and forgot to replace it.

Glenlivet keeps really good secrets.  It’s me that shares them.

 

 

 

 

More Thoughts Inspired by an Evening with Glenlivet


 

My GLEN

 

There was a battle for my attention last night.  The kids were gone and I was alone, well okay, not really alone.  My St. Bernard, Aristotle, was with me.  As was my phone (read that as texts, messages), A new bottle of Glenlivet and FIOS TV movies.  I had an enjoyable text session…I thoroughly enjoyed “Brave” (yeah, sad isn’t it?  I watched a “kid” movie with no kids) but Glenlivet won the attention war.   And like it always does, it made me think about the following things….ready?

1.  This whole Petraeus thing.  What’s up with that?  Here’s what Glenlivet made me think (I’ll call Glenlivet GLEN because after all, I do share many a thought and evening with him)….First, I don’t trust our government, I just don’t.  I think politicians lie, cheat and steal all for the benefit of their wallets and power.  I have yet to ever meet an honest politician.  I was once a Republican, but that was before I was enlightened.  I’ve never been a Democrat…as a self-employed taxpayer, I have always been enlightened to their political antics.  I don’t agree with their tenets of tax, tax, tax….they wouldn’t feel that way if they paid as much tax as I and my family have then watch it frittered away with presidential comforts, seriously ignorant social programs and pork barrel expenditures. If I did that with my money, I would be living on the streets, but they don’t… But that’s another post.  Back to Glen and Petraeus.  I think Petraeus knew all about the Libyan terrorist attack on our Embassy many months ago and threatened to let the American people know that fact.  Right before the election no less!   In retaliation (and because Hilary Clinton’s  “it’s my own fault” speech didn’t work) the present Administration threatened back with this “mistress” revelation.  Funny how it all happened after the election was won.  Funny how both of the women involved have been to the White House.   Funny how our government can snoop out personal issues, but not terroristic ones.  Funny how by labeling Petraeus an adulterer (only Bill Clinton’s teflon personality can let that label slide off) it does the following:

  • Takes the attention away from the Libyan bombing.
  • Makes the religious zealots, teabaggers and true Christians uncomfortable.
  • Makes the Administration look really good to its constituents for “blowing the Scarlet Letter whistle” on a one-time warmonger.
  • Assures the short-term memory of Americans don’t remember how close the election was and how bad the economy is.

What do you think?  Is Glen pulling my leg?  Or are we really becoming more stupid as Americans?

2.  Does anyone know if Andy Samberg wrote the Rap lyrics for Jimmy Fallon’s sketches on SNL when Samberg first started and Fallon was on his way out?  I watched a rerun last night and I so heard the Samberg style in Fallon’s funny rap songs.  (yeah, Glen knew I was getting way too deep on the military/political issue so he lightened me up!)

3.  Would it be really bitchy of me to make a Pinterest board of things I dislike?  I mean, Pinterest is so “touchy, feely, glittery” and I would be adding an element of negativity.  Good or bad?  Your thoughts?

4.  Miguel Cabrera over Mike Trout for MVP?  Really?  Were the sportswriters who were voting under Glen’s spell as well?  The Angels would have NEVER gotten as far as they did without Trout.  Really?  Another epic voting failure.  Sheesh, it seems to be contagious!

So that’s it.  I’m really worried about the Israeli war.  I’m really worried about this country’s future.  I want to do something to make it stop, but don’t know how other than to educate my children.  My next task is to find out how difficult it would be to start another political party…I would call it “THE PATRIOT PARTY” for people who feel like I do.  The time’s they are a-changing, and not in a good way.

As usual, please don’t email, text or comment with hateful barbs.  Glen inspired me.  (though I actually invited him to do so)  It’s not Glenlivet, it’s the freedom of thinking.  I don’t want to lose that either!